I must stop this whole thing! Why, for twenty-nine years I’ve put up with it now. I must stop this relationship from coming… but how? And he thought. And he thought, and he thought.
What’s so great about it? What is it I’m missing? The love, the companionship, the hugs, the kissing? He was stumped for a moment. He was stumped for hour, perhaps even an day. A week, a month…he couldn’t be certain, he just couldn’t say.
And then it hit him. From nowhere it came. He couldn’t hide it any longer, and she was to blame.
I thought about writing this entire blog in rhyme…but I didn’t have the time. There was no patience for neither I, nor you. So I’ll get to the point, before you need the loo.
I’ve had a lot to think about the last few months. Old relationships. New relationships. Romantic, platonic, biological, symbiotic..And I find it perfectly normal that we need, nay want, something, someone to complete us. We have a biological imperative, as well as a social agenda, to wear one another. See how they fit. How they make us feel. A person to reject us. A person to accept us. It’s as if the meaning of self, is only a matter of reflection in another. If that is true…
Then who are we? Who are you? Do you know what you want? Do you know what you need? Did you know that the moment you knew what you wanted, would be the moment you realized you never knew?
Jagger not only had moves, but he knew how to write. He had many words to sing, and a few he got right.
“You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need”
He also had a big mouth…But wisdom has been proven to come from the most strangest of places. But what it says to me…
Every time I thought I had it right. Every time, I said that this could be it. It was based on the idea that we had any say in it at all. And the truth is. We don’t.
I imagine you’re thinking that we are a step above the missing link. We have opposable thumbs (for texting obviously). We have the power to communicate vocally (though regrettably lacking adequate articulation in most cases). But above all else, we make the choices that make us who we are. Hence, the actions we take and the decisions we make every day dictate how the world works…but is that really true either?
The interesting part of relationships, is that they always change. Who we are, what we are, how we are. What we like today, tomorrow, or in ten years. Different people fit at different times in varying situations, and we are at the will of a world that knows no reason. And we have to accept that. We have to acknowledge that we change, that the world changes, and relationships forged yesterday, today, or tomorrow, will also change.
To get to the point, which I so often have a problem getting to…Embrace life. Embrace change. Embrace one another. I love my parents dearly though I don’t always get to say it. If you would have told me we would be friends and equals and learn to accept one another for the wide ranging, ever changing people, we are, ten years ago I would have never believed you. My brother now with a wife and children, I never would have thought I would be envious, nor would I have considered those choices in his life for myself.
With so much to lose. So many weights to bare. So many unforeseen events that could happen at any moment…it is easy to see why one would choose to live without them.
But we cannot hide from it. It will find you. Hope will find you. Love will find you. When you least expect it. Everything in this world takes times, and patience. There is a fee to be paid. A toll if you will. And what it asks of us, is change. Lincoln, Jefferson, that other guy with the face…We have to be the change. Be willing to see. Willing to accept. Willing to grow. And when you do…You will find everything, you never knew you couldn’t live without.